If you would have told me 5 years ago that I would be celebrating my 35th birthday in Mont Tremblant, I would have doubted every word. This birthday felt very different than any before. When I was diagnosed in 2009 I wasn’t sure I would make it to see 31. As much as I hate to admit it, I honestly felt that I would never see 35. At that point in time, I thought my days were numbered.Continue Reading
Mark’s MRI for his brain and CT scans of his body are scheduled next week. The week of his 35th birthday and five years since he was initially diagnosed.
I can’t stop playing over the chain of events in the past several years.
There’s been so many magical moments and so many life altering ones.Continue Reading
Today I hate cancer. I feel like it hovers above me like a dark cloud. It is with me wherever I go and I can’t escape its grasp. I have scans coming up and I think this has triggered the fear and anxiety that I work so hard at controlling. I can go for weeks without it really interfering but knowing that the doctors will take a glimpse at the tumor in a few weeks, scares the hell out of me. It brings up raw feelings. Feelings of anger, fear and vulnerability. I feel frozen and I’m not sure how to move forward.Continue Reading
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